Thursday, July 23, 2009

A change of heart

A few weeks ago, I was invited to attend a gathering of a local prayer group. The meeting in question took place tonight, and to be honest, I found myself thinking all day today that I'd rather do anything other than go to this meeting.

This isn't the first time that I find myself almost wishing that I hadn't said yes to a commitment. Even after I had arrived on site, I still found myself looking for a moment of silence to 'run away' from the obligation I had accepted.

I wonder if I'm alone in thinking that I just can't seem to say no to requests that are made of me, but I have a feeling that I might be surprised at how many others often find themselves in the same position.

The surprising thing about this group is that every time I start out with the feeling that I want to back out of the commitment to be present, or that I wish I hadn't said yes in the first place, I find that by the time I've fulfilled the commitment, I'm in a much different space. This has happened more than once, and so I'm beginning to believe that it's not my doing. Rather, the group in question is always very appreciative of the fact that I take the time to be present, and perhaps more markedly, I often (if not always) have a renewed appreciation for the value of prayer when I've completed such an encounter.

The gift of hospitality is a divine gift that some of us are especially charged to share with others. It's a gift that is in evidence with this group, even at moments when gentle welcomes and words are the farthest thing from my mind, or when I am more jaded by doubt about the sincerity of the gift being offered.

Perhaps if we were more astutely aware of the gift offered in our daily encounters, we might run the risk of growing in humility and learn how to pay closer attention to the divine voice that calls us all to honest living and generous giving.

For those in our lives who challenge us to be the best that we can, we should always give thanks.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you would only realize that you have the ability of reach out and help so many of us with your words of wisdom and your guidance, thereby comforting us in our suffering, and how much you are able to nourish the souls of those who are in such a great need, I believe you would also realize that we see and hear Christ among us healing us. It is one of the few places where people from many different parishes are able to receive the benefits of your gifts. I pray you realize how much you are needed.

Anonymous said...

And I would add I pray you realize how much you are appreciated and loved by all! It's unfortunate that the people who share their gifrs with others so often are the ones who don't hear the recipients words of praise and gratitude...